what does true courage look like?

That’s the question I’d like us to ask ourselves today. With all that’s been going on in our currently messed up world, a lot of us have been left wondering how we could be so selfish sometimes.

(I know that’s a lot of “s”s)

Take for example the start of lockdown when people were actually literally physically bashing each other’s heads for toilet roll or bread or paper. There’s been some serious heroes out there, giving help to those who need it and putting others first; but…

I kinda touched on this in last weeks post, but courage isn’t just getting what you want when you want it. It’s not even always punching the bad guys in the face (though it feels good and probably does help in certain situations). True courage is standing up to people who are doing wrong with the RIGHT reasons in mind, not just mindlessly throwing your punches at people because you like feeling you’re “doing the right thing”. We all know that these are excuses for just trying to look cool or getting one over on people. Real courage goes deep.

Real courage also shows true bravery by doing things that most of us wouldn’t consider brave; talking to someone you don’t know, fighting through the pain of a loss or betrayal, looking after those uncool kids who don’t have anyone to protect them from bullies. Those are the things that should matter a lot more than simply getting rid of a threat because courage is so much more than that. In my experience, courage is having the strength to do something even if you’re afraid to — BECAUSE IT’S RIGHT. Not because you want to or someone else wants you to or because you feel like it will help in some way…if it’s the right thing to do, do it!

Courage can mean different things for different people. You may not feel very brave or like you can make a difference, but in your own world in your own way you can show your courage by doing simple things that might be taken for granted. This shouldn’t make us proud – it should make us humble, willing to get up and do some good but not for our own feelings or benefit. There are various ways we each show our courage; here are just a few down below.

1. Sacrificing something. If you missed your bus because you helped an old lady with your shopping, you have a kind of courage that sacrifices. It’s amazing to both see and do this kind of courage – it’s grounded on true dignity and bravery. But even though helping an elderly person can seem big at times, you can also sacrifice by not getting in a fight with your mum after she’s argued with your dad, not bringing up past hurts or sharing; which leads us to the next kind of courage…

2. Sharing something. There are always days when we need me-time, self help and a bit of something to ourselves…but in the long run sharing takes its own kind of courage. Giving away what we have is so full of bravery but actually letting your younger sister play with your watercolour brush pens can take a lot more stamina than you would imagine. When we share something we are not only using/doing something we love, we’re spending time with and helping another who is also enjoying it. This is also a type of self-sacrifice because we are giving up our energy and time to let others help.

3. Being honest. Sometimes the hardest thing to be brave about is to be raw and real with people. Now I’m not saying do that all the time — there are definitely different places and situations that is NOT a good idea and you should be careful who you choose to confide in…but that should never stop you from swallowing whatever it is (guilt, shame or worry) and honestly telling someone how you feel, what you really want to do or where you are in life just now. This courageous act is so important because being honest with people will help you see another’s perspective and not feel caged inside all the time because you don’t want to let anyone know what you’re struggling with.

4. Have hope. We human beings seem to have an enormous capacity to make ourselves and everyone around us feel glum. It may take courage to be happy when you feel like things are going wrong but there’s always a bright side if we choose to look for it, like a nice coffee you managed to snatch before that terrible meeting at work or the little kid from your childminding who finally smiled at your jokes after throwing a fit. Even if there seems nothing left to be happy about, choose to look forward to a new day. For those who find it hard to keep organised and spend a lot of time beating themselves up about it, I know the feeling! That is a key way that I can become unhappy, but I’ve found writing lists and forcing myself to get up in time really helps despite how hard it can be. Look forward to better things and your entire outlook on life will be transformed if only for a short amount of time. Find hope in the small things, and eventually the bigger things won’t seem like mountains.

It’s crazy how so many things can come from a root of choices, thoughts and ultimately courage. We can change the world we live in, no matter how small it may seem or how insignificant. Having courage helps us to aim better, stay happier and get closer to those around us.

Will you choose it?